In celebration of Self-Love Day, Life Is Good OC is excited to feature Spiritual Laundry‘s Maria Martinez of Huntington Beach as our guest contributor. Maria brings a wealth of knowledge from her extensive background in spiritual healing, yoga, and artistic creativity. Her article delves into the essence of self-love, challenging and guiding us to seek it within rather than through external validations.Â
Join us as Maria shares her insights on embracing and understanding the multifaceted nature of self, and the journey to self-love as the ultimate form of self-care.
Self-love is not impossible. You are just searching in all the wrong places. It’s time to reroute.
Before feeling safe, we must first feel loved. In a world where we’ve been taught that safety comes first, we tend to forget that love is universal. And even though two things can be true at once, one must precede the other for harmony to manifest. But in a society where daily demands leave us drained, disconnected, and exhausted, where do we find such? The answer lies in understanding yourself.
Self-love, dear one, is the gentle (and daily) art of treating yourself with the same kindness, compassion, and respect you offer others. It’s the sacred practice of honoring your own needs and wants just as you honor the worthiness of those around you. It’s the recognition that you’re worthy of love simply because you exist. It can only be found within.
Yet we’ve become masters at seeking and gaining external validation to feel loved. We grasp at fleeting moments of confirmation, pour our energy into pleasing others, and neglect our well-being in the process, all in hopes of feeling a sense of belonging or an incredibly fulfilling and expansive momentary high. But this isn’t self-love. It is not even love. It is preventing ourselves and others from evolution.
We’ve become masters at seeking to fulfill an internal feeling with an external experience because we haven’t been taught how to fulfill an internal feeling with an internal resource. This is where a spiritual practice can redirect you.
Resourcing is what self-love offers you. It is the strength and vital force we all wish we had more of. It cannot be purchased in stores or found by good luck. It is part of who you are. It moves through you as a universal source of energy and empowers you as you pay attention to what you do with how you feel and need.
A spiritual practice, any wellness or mindfulness practice that speaks to your heart, speaks to your inner being, and for that, opens the doors to resourcing. That is ultimately what we want in life: to feel replenished. This is also known as feeling loved (so we can feel safe), but not just any kind of love will suffice; it’s self-love that we seek.
As we journey inward—the path of any spiritual practice—we realize that self-love isn’t just a concept to be understood intellectually; it’s a state of being to be fully experienced. It’s the recognition that we are more than our external identities or achievements and that we are multifaceted beings with infinite potential.
Indeed, you are more than just your name, personality, past, or future. You are more than your achievements and failures. You are a Human Being. You have both masculine and feminine traits. You have a consciousness and subconscious. You have a Soul, an inner child, and—to take it a bit further—you also have a Higher Self. You embody all these characteristics, and these are just a few of the many pieces that make you you. Having multiple dimensions makes you a multi-dimensional person.
All these traits, parts, or pieces of yourself might be grouped under your name, title, or role. However, when you separate yourself from these outward titles, you witness an array of stunning and endless parts and pieces of yourself. These are parts patiently waiting to be seen, understood, welcomed, and loved by you and only by you. When you recognize and understand who you are trying to love, you create the roadmap to start loving yourself.
We tend to fail to love and accept ourselves because we are loving merely a small fraction of this intricate mosaic that defines us. That’s why it’s nearly impossible to love yourself when you see yourself as simply one unit—you are more than who you are trying to love.
So when seeking self-love, pay attention to what part of you you are trying to connect with and love. And when self-love is absent as you try to get in touch with, pay attention to what part of you, you reject and find it challenging to see through compassionate eyes.
If you are struggling to engage in this sort of introspection on your own, engaging in a spiritual practice can help. Through meditation, writing, movement, breathwork, and introspection, you cultivate a deep sense of awareness and presence, enabling you to align with the diverse person that you are. You know who and what you’re seeking to love when you know yourself. You are introduced to all the parts of yourself that are here to assist you, support you, and empower you at different times and circumstances in your life. You comprehend why you have the different parts of yourself and learn how to use those parts for your own good—serving you as a gateway to accessing your full potential.
Ultimately, self-love is a journey of self-discovery, self-acceptance, and self-compassion. It’s about embracing and understanding all aspects of yourself—your strengths, weaknesses, and vulnerabilities—and taking the time to get to know them. It is the most beautiful journey you could ever embark on. For when you recognize that you’re more than what you think you are, self-love becomes natural; it becomes part of you, for it is you. You are love.
Dear one, I’m here to remind you that self-love is the only thing we are being asked to do, and yet it is the first thing we run away from. The love, strength, and life force you seek will never come from outside sources.
Even though this might sound like a long journey, all you need to do is take the first step. Once you are in, you will taste the beauty of your own love, and you will realize that you have never felt love like it before. That is how powerful you are. That is how irresistible this journey is.
Click here to learn more about Maria Martinez and Spiritual Laundry. You can also follow her @spirituallaundry.
